This is a message for match.com user norcrossharry of Norcross, Georgia. It was recently called to my attention that you are using a photo of me as your match.com profile image. Unless you are my long lost twin brother and you've somehow taken an identical photo, that's not you, and this is not cool.
The photo in question was actually taken by Eric Nakamura back in June 2008. I remember taking it. But it is now being used by a self-described 37-year-old short Asian man ("Move on if that is not what you are looking for") to find love on the internets.
I'm not really sure what you expect to happen if and when you actually make a connection, and end up having to meet your true internet love in person, at a cafe or something. It's going to be apparent fairly quickly to her that something's up. That's not even an old photo of you -- that's not even you. Period.
Or maybe you're counting on the old stereotype that all Asians look alike?
So you say you've been dating for almost twenty years without much success. It's been a hard road. But come on, man. How about a little self-respect? And dude! You describe yourself as "not a particularly good looking guy" -- then you use my photo? Now I'm just plain offended.
Happy new year, norcrossharry. I hope you find the love that you're looking for. I really do. But you're definitely not going to find it by pretending to be someone else. Man up, and use your own goddamn photo.
Sincerely,
The Guy Whose Likeness You've Stolen
