4.09.2009

The Betty Brown Name Generator

Following up Texas state Rep. Betty Brown's ridiculous, offensive suggestion that Asian American voters, with our strange and exotic Asian names, should adopt names that are "easier for Americans to deal with" ... whatever the hell that means. But if you're actually interested in following Rep. Brown's advice, here's a handy Betty Brown Name Generator.

Is your name too hard to understand? Pesky Asian heritage got you down? Change your weird, unwieldly, foreign Asian name into a more digestible name that Americans can "deal with." Betty Brown Approved! God forbid anyone would have to deal with un-American sounding name, or anything other than Smith, Jones or Brown.

Granted, the name generator isn't very sophisticated. I've entered a number of names and just keep getting variations on 'Billy-Ray "Chicken and Dumplings" Brown.' But hey, according to Betty Brown's standards, the simpler the better, right? Don't want a name that's going to trip up "Americans," like those difficult Chinese names.

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